Friday, September 22, 2006

Feeling Low....

It's that time of year again - yes the dreaded appraisals 8-( I had my appraisal on Wednesday, it lasted for 2 hours and to be honest, it was rather soul destroying. I was in tears for a large portion of it (which I hate, but I just get so emotional) and evoked a killer migraine that evening. I ended up with eyes like giant red golf balls and all I wanted to do was curl up and sleep. I hate confrontation, detest arguing/raised voices and being a people pleaser, feel distraught when I'm told that "when stressed, I alienate a particular group of people" 8-(

That's a strong word and seeing as they've made no mention to it previously, it's rather knocked me for 6. I know that I have to talk about it with them, but to be honest, I'm not really in the right frame of mind yet. There were a lot of positives from my appraisal, they are very pleased with the data that I've generated, I'm hardworking, take great pride in my work, have an attention to detail which they love and help out my colleagues whenever I can. There were other issues that came up and unfortunately you always seem to focus on the "you need to do this, you need to do that and you need to focus on doing this better" parts, which there were plenty of too.

I'm picking myself up, dusting myself down, giving a huge scream of "AAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHH", which actually always makes me feel soooooooooooooo much better, putting a smile on my face and feeling that I can contribute again and not pull people down with me.

Just want to finish by saying that I am thinking of one of my jellie team friends, whose father in laws funeral is today. Please keep their family in your thoughts and prayers today.

4 Comments:

Blogger Debs said...

Aw ((hugs)) for you darlin' sorry you have to go through that ordeal but good on ya for picking yourself up and getting on with things. Have a fabby weekend!

4:28 pm  
Blogger Tracie H said...

Focus on the positives Allie and move onwards and upwards....90/10 remember :)

Hugs
Txx

7:52 pm  
Blogger Alison Docherty said...

just remember Allie.....these people sit on the toilet with their trousers round their ankles like everyone else....they are no better than you....never forget that..
hugs
Alxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

7:03 pm  
Blogger Ann Freeman (mafswife) said...

I don't ever mind having my appraisal (but the ego does ofetn take a dent or too) but I detest doing them. I find it quite terrifying as whatever I say comes out wrong and I always upset the person no matter what. Hope you can stay positive and remember when Alison said!! Works great in interview situations that too!!

8:55 pm  

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